Thursday, September 18, 2008

'MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO' REALITY

REALITY !!!.....REALITY !!!....Or is it?

Are you getting a little bit disgusted with reality TV?
I bet you have thought,just like me, "I'd like to show them a little reality!"

What is wrong with our society? Where did everything go wrong?
Why does it seem that people of all walks of life have their priorities all in the wrong place?

Do you ever take a trip down 'memory lane'? Try it sometime. It is an eye opener. Maybe you will be able to retrace steps taken and help others not make the same mistakes.

For one, I'm sure many children watched their parents going out on a limb purchasing things on credit cards that they knew their parents did not have the money for. Also, how many times did your kids ask for something, and you would tell them you did not have the money for it today. What did they say to you? "Just write a check for it Daddy!" Today they say, " Can't you use your card. At the time you thought it was funny and just laughed at them. Of course, at that time they had no idea where the money really came from.

How many people do you know that can not, and or will not pay their rent, mortgage, car payment, utilities or anything on time. These same people are constantly on the look out for something new to purchase or even to buy on time. Just another bill that will be paid late. You would think at some point they'd learn from their mistakes.

Even worse, now a days, teenagers get credit cards inthe mail that they did not request, BUT how can you decline a no interest credit card. Of course they do not read the fine print.

Maybe it all began when we as parents decided that we did not want our children to grow up as we did. BUT...What was so wrong with that/ When I look back on the 50's and the 60's, it wasn't that bad. Our parents gave us all they could, but they taught us at the same time that it was not free. Someone has to work and pay for all the nice things in life.. It did seem to me that if I worked hard for something, then I appreciated it a lot more.

WE HAVE CREATED A VERY SPOILED, SELFISH GENERATION!!!!!!!!

Today couples marry with all kinds of extravagances. Parents pay more for some weddings, than the couple will earn, with both of their yearly incomes combined. Exotic honeymoons, cars homes for their newlyweds....so much of this, we had learned, came with time and hard work. Most couples now soon realize they wish their parents had given them the money instead. We began housekeeping with hand-me-down furniture and crates for shelving. We thought nothing of it. All our friends were in the same boat. We did not expect everything on a silver platter.

In the last 30 years there has been a gradual decline in our way of living. Many would not agree with me, for some would say that we have it better now than ever before. Science and technology have surpassed all we ever expected, yet, moral decline, lack of family structure, lack of discipline in our children or even in our habits have caused great hardships in our daily living. Maybe someone should step up to the plate, and say, "Let's begin today, in our homes, making some changes that will hopefully improve the lives of the next generation. Hopefully our grand childrens lives will be better for it.

To start with the schools give our children unrealistic expectations. For example, in the 90's one of my sons had an economic teacher that requested that each student do a budget for themselves... giving them a budget to work with of 3000 dollars a month. To me, this was a little crazy in itself. No young person graduating from H.S. or College, can enter the work force with a starting salary of 3000 dollars. I knew that the teacher did not even make that much after 20 years of teaching. Sooooo...Here you go.....already making them think they would make that much. Who couldn't make a budget for one person with 3000 dollars a month to work with...That was several years ago and I dare say not many people today can count on that kind of income.

How about we give them the FACTS!!! Tell them about minimum wage. Minimum wage has not increased much ar all since I married in 1974. Seems like it was about 3.50- 3.75 then.....in 1996...4.15 .....1997.....5.15. To this day,it is still not much better. Let's be realistic. If the minimum wage is not going to change.....THEN....we need to TEACH our young people how to exist with less.

Instead of buying our teens cars at the age of eighteen, or the completion of H>S>, and expecting them to take up the payments when they move out, maybe we should allow them to work summer jobs and learn to save money to put down or pay for a car they can maintain, gas, insurance and all the other things that come along with it.

Seems like all we do nowadays, is to show our children the welfare lines. We all know this is not the solution.

WE HAVE TO LEARN TO LIVE WITHIN OUR MEANS !!!!!

So many times our actions would make our children think it is better to be
something or someone other than who we really are. What is the old saying?
MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO.....There must be a lot of truth to that. ( You do know that the apples doesn't fall too far from the tree. You get my meaning.?)

We need to teach our children that is OK to be themselves. I talk to teenagers and young adults all the time that are constantly worrying about that someone else thinks, or whether it be their hair, their apparel, what party to go to, or events to participate in. My conversations with them has proven to me that much of what they do.....THEY DO NOT EVEN ENJOY THEMSELVES!!!! They just don't want to be labeled 'different'. You know what's crazy about this is the parents are just as bad or even worse and we wonder why the children have a problem. If your neighbor upgrades and buys and new car, you think you have to buy one better. If your closes friend joins a golf or health club, you think you have to also. It doesn't matter that you don't like golf and you really don't have the extra money to do it anyway, but for some wild reason, you follow along and do it anyway. What is WRONG with this?

It is OK to be YOU. We live in a diverse world. It is OK to be different. Be ...
WHAT YOU ARE !!!

Don't you know that sooner or later the real you will come rolling out when you least expect it. It would be more embarrassing to pretend to be J.Lo or Jennifer Anniston type and all of a sudden, Miss Minnie Pearl emerges with a
"HOW-DY !" You will be most respected for being who you truly are. Don't worry, even Minnie Pearl had class. She was a wonderful woman.

My dad had a favorite saying, "Plan like you will live forever and live like you could die in the next moment." Living this way eliminates a lot of worry and stress.

Here are some suggestions :

  • Encourage children to read everything.
  • Help them realize what their best qualities are.
  • Encourage them to learn all they can and be their best at what they enjoy the most.
  • Encourage them to think like an entrepreneur.
  • Discover the things in life that they do not need.
  • Learn the absolutes to exist, not the wants.
  • Go for all the education they can afford.
  • If they want to work in medicine , then they need to volunteer in some hospital or nursing home to find out what it is like to care for sick people..(it is different when you get in to it)
  • Don't buy a Porsche until you have the job to pay for it.
  • Don't accept credit cards till you have established yourself in a sound STEADY JOB. Charge no more than you can pay for in months time. Never pay interest. (Usually if you don't have the cash for it, you are better off without the item.)
  • Know that there are no absolutes in the work place anymore. Most of us know that we will not ever get retirement from the companies we work for. They usually find a reason to get us go two weeks or a month before our retirement party. This BITES....BIG TIME...I KNOW....BUT IT IS REALITY !!!!!
  • REMEMBER......YOU NEED TO LOVE THE WORK YOU DO. YOU WILL BE DOING IT EVERYDAY OF YOUR LIFE. (Which now could be a very long time with the new sciences and technology that we have. We have vitamins and natural serums that coul help you live to the ripe old age of 125. Who knows?) Think....Do I want to be doing this 80-100 years? ( Social security may be extinct soon, if we keep giving it all away. .)
  • Be practical. Get the job in a field you know the most about, before you make purchases that would get you in a financial bind. REMEMBER.....YOU PAY THE BILLS.!!!!
  • After your freshman year in college, take a personal financial poll of your activities. If you are in debt to the tune of 25000 or more on cards or big purchases, know that you have started out all wrong. It will take you forever if ever to get out of debt. You will always be behind unless someone helps to get you out of it.. Unless you have a
  • RICH UNCLE HARRY....Don't count on that happening. Lets get REAL....LIFE IS WHAT WE MAKE IT....most of the time.

I met a country music producer once that was going through some rough times. I told him...Maybe you should think about downsizing some. His reply was that his business had been downsizing for some time, but it was not helping his situation that much. He told me he was still working 14-16 hours a day, 7 days a week. The man was totally exhausted. He was doing everything he could to supply for his family in the lifestyle they had become accustomed.

After many talks together about this I told him, " Maybe you need to downsize at home, not work." I began to explain this to him. For instance, you probably have 4 cars in the garage....yes...4000+sf home....yes.....can't find your wife....???....house is too big.....2 children under the age of 4....the children have everything they need for housekeeping in THEIR bedrooms. They don't even have to learn to get along with anyone else. They don't even have to come out of their rooms unless they want to. The cars you have will be antiques be the time the children can drive. You and your wife can only drive one car at the time......Are you getting the picture? Bet you haven't had a date with your wife in a long time. Guess you have to find her first, huh? There is a lot to be said about having a home small enough so you can catch her. My dad once told me that their first home was so small that Mom's apron strings could catch on fire while washing dishes. In that case its nice to have someone close who can come up behind you and hug you, and put the fire out before you knew you were on fire. Needless to say....I think you'd be able to ffind her and probably have a long 50 years together.

I've never seen a U-Haul connected to any hearse leaving this ole earth. You sure can not take it with you. Why work so hard for something you are going to leave behind anyway. Only the eternal will last anyway.

Think about it....smaller house....2 cars....less mortgage....don''t have to work so many hours and you can enjoy watching your children grow up and maybe will not be so worn out. Empty nest years should even be better.

Learn what's important, and what is not. De-stress our lives and teach our children the same. Life will be worth living and giving to others. Reality can be a GOOD THING !!!


REMEMBER.....MONKEY SEE, MONKEY DO !!! WHAT DO THEY SEE AT YOUR HOUSE ???

3 comments:

Over 50 said...

I think you are a very wise person. And it shows that life has taught you very much. Thanks for sharing your many words of wisdom.

IBFREE4NOW said...

Thanks, but I don't consider myself wise, maybe just street smart from all I've been through. Wish somethings could be learned easier, but I guess not. That's life for you. Trouble is really a 4 letter word....LIFE.

Kimmi said...

Right on!

Kimberly